Hector's Week 15 Picks and Eliminator By Hector the Projector The Hecto-tron DA-42 has found itself a new nemesis. His name is Alexis Lemaire. He just broke his own world record by calculating the 13th root of a random 200-digit number in just more than a minute. Personally, I don't see the big deal, but the Hecto-tron DA-42 is so upset by this news, it has shut itself down for the week. That's a shame, because Week 14 was one of its strongest to date:
Week 14 (No spread): 13-3, Season-to-date: 140-68 Left to our own devices yet again, we're going to follow Lemaire's lead and simply use our own brain power. No data. No analysis of trends. Just a good, old-fashioned, gut-feeling approach to the picks. We'll see how it goes. Thursday, Dec. 13 Denver at Houston (-1½) Mike Shanahan is an evil sorcerer. Somehow he knows which running back you started in your fantasy football league. You go with Travis Henry. He goes with Selvin Young. You opt for Selvin, and he goes for Travis. Try to trick him and start both, and he pulls Andre Hall out of his pocket. Evil! But successful.
Broncos, 30-27. Saturday, Dec. 15 Cincinnati at San Francisco (+8½) The Niners did an amazing job of shutting down Adrian Peterson, but the Bengals have a far better passing game than the Vikings, who were able to win the game anyway. And you can't win if you don't score yourself. This one should be easy.
Bengals, 23-9. Sunday, Dec. 16 Jacksonville at Pittsburgh (-4½) David Garrard has been phenomenally consistent and has avoided mistakes this season. That changes here, as one early mistake snowballs into another and another. We've got to go with the home team here.
Steelers, 27-21. Atlanta at Tampa Bay (-10½) There is no way the Falcons will be ready for this game after the defection of their coach. The Buccaneers will win this game decisively, and the Falcons will be left cursing the memory of Bobby Petrino.
Bucs, 28-13. Seattle at Carolina (+7½) Matt Hasselbeck is operating on all cylinders, and the Panthers are ready to look to the future, likely sitting Vinny Testaverde in favor of young Matt Moore. Edge: Seattle.
Seahawks, 24-10. Green Bay at St. Louis (+10½) This one will be closer than you think. The Packers are content to run the ball and get through these next few weeks with as little risk to Brett Favre's health as possible. This will keep the Rams in the game longer than they would have been if the teams had met, say, a month ago.
Packers, 26-20. Baltimore at Miami (+4½) The Ravens believe the world is out to get them. The truth is, they simply aren't that good anymore. Even so, they still are light years ahead of the Dolphins, and the fear of losing another game -- and to a team without a win all season -- should keep them from completely falling apart.
Ravens, 21-10. New York Jets at New England (-24½) It's the largest point spread I can remember, and I'm still going with the favorites. Bill Belichick is not going to let up on his own personal Alexis Lemaire. Running up the score? I envision timeouts before the half to get extra possessions in.
Patriots, 48-13. Arizona at New Orleans (-3½) The Saints have to win their last four games just to have a chance at the playoffs. One down, three to go. The Cardinals are a decent team but don't play all that well away from home. The Saints are on a mission.
Saints, 27-21. Buffalo at Cleveland (-5½) This is the best game of the week. It's a mini-playoff affair. The winner goes on, the loser calls it a season. It's going to be a battle, but the Browns have been involved in so many last-minute controversies, we have to expect them to handle the pressure just a bit better.
Browns, 29-26. Tennessee at Kansas City (+3½) The Chiefs are awful. They let Jay Cutler throw for four scores in Week 14. Vince Young might not have that kind of arm, but he's not standing still, either. He can make his own space, and he will.
Titans, 21-16. Indianapolis at Oakland (+10½) The Colts want to win this one to lock up a fist-round bye. After that, Peyton Manning and company get to relax a little bit before the real season gets underway. Look for Indy to make quick work of the Raiders.
Colts, 34-10. Detroit at San Diego (-11½) The thing about guarantees is that you don't get to gloat about being right until you are, you know, actually right. At 6-2, Jon Kitna could crow pretty loudly about his 10-win prediction. Today, at 6-7? Not so much.
Chargers, 27-12. Philadelphia at Dallas (-10½) The Cowboys narrowly got past the Lions, and we think they kind of liked the adrenaline rush. They've got a bye all but locked up, and we think they kind of like the feeling of the close ones. They'll let Philly hang around.
Cowboys, 30-28. Washington at New York Giants (-4½) There's almost no way the Giants can fail to make the playoffs. Where have we heard that before? Another monumental collapse? Not likely. But that doesn't mean they won't give it the old college try.
Redskins, 21-20. Monday, Dec. 17 Chicago at Minnesota (-9½) All you need to know about this game is that Kyle Orton is going to be the Bears' quarterback. After this performance, the headlines in the Windy City likely will be "Orton Hears a Boo!"
Vikings, 25-22.
Eliminator
The ESPN Eliminator picks were better than average, another 4-2 last week, putting us at 53-31 for the season. Not bad, considering we don't simply stock up on the Cowboys, Patriots, Colts and Packers like some pundits do. Letting ride our winners from Week 14 (where possible) … our picks for Week 15:
Gold Picks:Washington, Minnesota That's what we've got for you. Hopefully, we'll be able to manage without our technological crutch. But somehow, we know a good week for us will cause the Hecto-tron DA-42 to sink further into its depression. And then it's another trip to the Buy More and spa treatment from the Nerd Herd. (Sigh.) Good luck everyone! |
Prizes
Play Eliminator Challenge for your chance to win a $2,500 Best Buy gift card and the Ultimate Fan Pack!
Total ARV is $3,000
